Public Service Announcement

Don't Drink and Drive!

No, really. If there is any question about your blood alcohol level or your motor skills, don't do it. Not because you're a danger to others, which you probably are, but also because you will get your ass thrown in jail or AA. I don't mean to be flip about the dangers of drunk driving to the general community, but you can be arrested and CONVICTED of DUII even if you're below .08. And, btw, .08 is not the "limit" - .079 is the limit. But like I said, the limit doesn't much matter because if the officer can prove in court that you failed the field sobriety test or were unfit in some other way, your ass is toast.

After arraigning dozens, if not over 100, DUII cases in the past few weeks I have learned a few things. First, the police know what to write down - bloodshot/watery eyes, slurred speech, jerky movements (or slow movements!), odor of alcoholic beverage. They have several versions of the field sobriety test and they rate you and each element. If you can't touch your nose on the first try, don't drive. If you can't walk 10 steps toe to toe without stepping out of line, don't drive. If you're talking funny, don't drive. If you're an animated drunk and you've become animated, don't drive.

If you opt for "diversion" you can have the charge dismissed or discharged at the end of a year of twice-weekly AA meetings (might not be a year, maybe only 6 months). If you fail diversion you are sentenced instantly because to get into the program you have to plead guilty. If you opt for trial you may very well get jail time or a $6000 fine.

This is of course the wrong audience for this message - I should be blogging at law students an undergrads, but I thought I should get the word out. A DUII is not hard to get and it's WAY worse than a piddly little speeding ticket. Cab fare is infinitely worth it.